The Mayonnaise Jar and 2 Cups of Coffee

A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of him. When the class began, he wordlessly picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls. He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was.

The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls. He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was.

The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else. He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with an unanimous "yes."

The professor then produced two cups of coffee from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar effectively filling the empty space between the sand. The students laughed.

"Now," said the professor as the laughter subsided, "I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life. The golf balls are the important things---your family, your children, your health, your friends and your favorite passions---and if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full.

The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your house and your car.

The sand is everything else---the small stuff. "If you put the sand into the jar first," he continued, "there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls. The same goes for life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff you will never have room for the things that are important to you.

"Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Spend time with your children. Spend time with your parents. Visit with grandparents. Take time to get medical checkups. Take your other half out to dinner. Play another 18. There will always be time to clean the house and fix the drains. Take care of the golf balls first---the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand."

One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the coffee represented. The professor smiled and said, "I'm glad you asked."

The coffee just shows you that no matter how full your life may seem, there's always room for a couple of cups of coffee with a friend."

電郵來由一位博客，看完后也思索一下，寫下了這篇。

小時候在父母身邊長大。長大到了一定的時間，離開父母去深造。隨著我離開去深造，父母的生活擔子加重了。因為需加倍的工作，也許他們也忽略了他們的父母、健康、朋友及喜好等。

等到我畢業了，他們肩上的擔子稍微地減輕了。我還有弟妹，父母也期待能讓他們去深造。就這樣，父母的擔子又會再度加重，這情況一直再重覆著。

這時，父母更希望我能找份工作來幫忙減輕負擔，而不是留在身邊陪伴他們。因此，我就離鄉背井到大城市里找比較高薪的工作。相對地，城市里的生活費也比較高，能給家里的補貼也同樣有限。

因為工作的關系，漸漸地不常回家。

自從畢業到現在，在外地生活也已經有8年了。弟妹也相續地在畢業后，在外地找到工作，就像當年的我。父母肩上的擔子明顯地減輕了很多，但他們也確實蒼老了許多。

如果這時告訴我媽說，我想辭掉工作、回家陪他們，不知道他們會有什么反應。

基于我對我媽的了解，她更希望小孩能各自獨立發展事業，最基本的能混得三餐溫飽。對于能留在家里陪她，她更希望她能有更多的私人空間，從事她以往不敢奢想的嗜好。還有，如果時間和經濟上允許，她和我爸倆乘現在雙腳還能走，能到處走走 -- 這點我可以讓他們如愿。

我想，有時候我們單方面的想法，不一定是他們所希望的。開口問，是最直接的方式。



PS:4月3日是我媽的生日，祝她：身體健康，心想事成。

PS:我家6位成員都個別分布在不同地方，老爸（沙巴-亞庇），老媽（家鄉-麻坡），我（兩新之間），老二（沙撈越-美里），老三及小妹（新山-古來）。

-終-